????? 2024 Toyota Corolla 1.8 VVT-h Excel – The Sensible Car With a Wild Side ???????? Miles: 12,545 (barely broken in) 1 Owner: Just one careful human ????‍?? Looks: Decuma Grey—like Batman’s tuxedo. Transmission: Automatic, for those who prefer coffee in one hand and zero gears in the other. Fuel Type: Petrol Hybrid – for when you want to save the planet, but also arrive on time. ???? The “Excel” Trim – Because You're Better Than “Basic” This isn't just a Corolla. This is the Excel, aka the “I do spreadsheets during the day, but party in the car park after work” spec. ???? It’s got all the bells, whistles, beeps, bops and things that go ping. ???? Tech so Smart, It Might Be Judging You Touchscreen infotainment (looks like a small cinema screen) Apple CarPlay & Android Auto – because we refuse to let go of Google Maps shouting at us Built-in sat nav, just in case your phone dies after 8 hours of Spotify bangers Wireless charging ? (witchcraft!) Heated seats – warms your buns faster than a Greggs sausage roll Dual-zone climate control – perfect for couples who can’t agree on anything, including air ????? Safety Kit That Could Run the NHS Adaptive cruise control – because normal cruise control is for amateurs Lane keep assist – gentle nudges back into reality (and your lane) Emergency braking – in case you're texting your nan and miss the traffic Road sign assist – helpful if you’ve been ignoring speed limits since 2012 ? Hybrid Life = Fewer Fuel Stops + Moral Superiority It's part-electric, part-petrol, and fully smug. You’ll be out-driving, out-saving, and out-smugging everyone at the petrol station. Also: ULEZ compliant = London says YES. ???? Space For: 5 people A boot full of regrets from IKEA Several medium-sized dogs or one overexcited Great Dane ???? Bonus Round: ? Full Toyota Service History – it's been pampered more than a reality TV star ? Still under Toyota warranty (and eligible for up to 10 years if you keep showing up with receipts) ? One-owner – the car equivalent of “never been dumped” ???? In Conclusion: It’s posh, it’s practical, it’s m