Right. Let’s address the elephant in the showroom. You may or may not approve of the great Chinese automotive surge — the four-wheeled equivalent of a takeaway that arrives suspiciously quickly — but here’s the awkward truth: the chaps from the Far East have absolutely mastered the art of giving you an indecent amount of car for not very much money. Take this MG ZS. It’s finished in something called Dynamic Red, which sounds like a setting on a malfunctioning tumble dryer, but in reality looks utterly magnificent. And not just “nice for the money” magnificent. Proper magnificent. The reason? It’s a 3-stage pearlescent paint job. Three stages! That’s not paint — that’s pâtisserie. It has depth. It has shine. It glows like it’s been lightly buttered by angels. Metallic paint? Please. That’s for people who clap when the plane lands. Then you notice the gloss black trim and diamond-cut alloys, which sit there looking smug, like they know they’ve absolutely nailed it. They’re the automotive equivalent of wearing a tailored suit with outrageously expensive shoes. Effortless. Slightly cocky. Brilliant. And here’s the really good bit: this particular car is a one-owner, ex-Motability example. Which means it’s been maintained properly. Religiously. Full service history. No corners cut. No “that’ll do.” It’s been looked after with the sort of diligence normally reserved for endangered pandas. Spec? Oh, it’s loaded. Air conditioning. Cruise control. Proper alloys. Electric windows and mirrors. And a touchscreen infotainment system with Apple CarPlay and Android Auto, so you can have sat nav, hands-free texting, WhatsApp and whatever other wizardry modern humans require to function. It’s essentially smarter than most of the people who’ll drive it. And just when you think it can’t get any better — it’s still under MG’s warranty until it’s seven years old. Seven! That’s not a warranty, that’s a long-term relationship. On top of that, you’ll get a fresh service and MOT thrown in. Free. Gratis. On the house. So yes, the Chinese automotive wave is very much here. And if this MG ZS is anything to go by, it hasn’t arrived quietly. It’s turned up in Dynamic Red, wearing diamond-cut wheels, and it’s grinning.