This is the Mitsubishi Shogun. It is not a "crossover." It is a two-ton testament to Japanese engineering that was honed in the dust and grit of the Dakar Rally. It has the 3.2-litre diesel enginea power unit so robust and dependable that it will likely outlive the human race. This one is finished in Black, giving it the subtle, menacing air of a private security detail. Inside, it's a different story. You get the Barbarian customisations, featuring those incredibly rare, electrically adjustable leather seats. They are heated, which is lovely, and they provide the kind of comfort you'd expect from a gentleman's club, even while you're traversing a ploughed field. Crucially, it has a manual gearbox. This means you get to decide exactly how to deploy all that low-down grunt, rather than waiting for an automatic brain to make a committee decision. And because we live in the 21st century, I've dragged the technology into the modern age. It now has an upgraded stereo with Apple CarPlay and a reversing camera, which is vital because, let's be honest, this thing is the size of a small cathedral. I've also fitted official front fog lights, so you can actually see where you're going when the British weather turns into a thick soup. I've also spent the money where it matters. It has a brand-new exhaust, fresh fan belts, and I've completely sorted the front end with new discs, pads, and calipers. It stops as well as it goes. Now, don't be thick. It is thirteen years old. It has "patina." There is wear and tear because it hasn't spent its life wrapped in cotton wool; it's spent its life being a Shogun. If you want a plastic, fragile toy that needs a software update every six minutes, go to a shopping centre. But if you want a rally-bred, go-anywhere, leather-lined tank that can pull a house down, this is it. Does not include private plate, this will be removed prior to sale. In daily use so milage will increase slightly.